Category Archives: children

Becoming a parent to my granddaughters, again!

Our daughter will be taking a new assignment and that means I am back being a parent to my granddaughters. Its been 5 years since our daughter deployed when her children came to live with us. At that time, my husband and I were totally unprepared for becoming our granddaughter’s guardians. But we love our granddaughters and  wanted to be there for them. It’s the same today.

But this time I will be a mobile grandma.Traveling out of state. The kids will be  staying with their stepfather and in their home. My son in law is a wonderful person. He was my daughter’s boyfriend when our she deployed, 5 years ago. He stepped in and supported my granddaughters and built a solid relationship. Over the years he has built a good relationship between my granddaughters. But becoming a single parent is challenging for anyone, especially a step dad.

This time I plan on going and staying for extended time very month. I have given a lot of thought about how we need to establish a system, so my granddaughters feel connected to my husband and I again. Along with allowing my son in law time for himself, to rest and know we are here to support him.

How we are going to do this I am unsure, just like 5 years ago. All I know is we love our daughter,granddaughters, and our son in law And we all want our daughter not to worry and her to do a great job.

Our love and faith in God will get us through this.

 

 

 

How to eliminate a generation gap with a teenager and preteen

As my grandchildren start get older  and  living far away I started  feeling like there was a  generation gap between us.

Our granddaughters have not  stayed with us for a long time. They have grown up so much and now have many other interests. The eldest granddaughter, Ivie likes being  on her Iphone texting  her friends, and listening to her music.

Bailey was busy on her Ipad, creating pictures, playing games and sending instant messages to her friends. How was I going to get their attention?

But when I look back at when I was 15 yrs. old I surely was in my own world wanting to be with my friends. I remember beginning  to create my own interest and ideas of the world. Friends were the most important thing at that age for me.

I decided to try and remember what it was like to be a teenager with younger siblings. I was the eldest with  3 siblings. I just wanted to have my own time, but I did enjoy taking my siblings places. I always enjoyed children.

I drove to Arizona and picked up Ivie and Bailey and drove back to California the next day. They  were so excited to come and stay with my husband and I especially because we live near the beach.  I know they love doing things with us and they are always willing to go places with us.

The eldest granddaughter, Ivie had saved her money up to buy a real beach cruiser bicycle.  Bailey  had grown out of her bicycle, so my husband Alan bought Bailey a new bike. He told me he enjoys buying  items for his granddaughters, especially something we can enjoy every day. The kids were so excited to go riding on  their new bikes. We rode our bikes along a beach path and it’s so much fun.

We packed our lunch and  rode our bikes along the beach. We rode over 10 miles. We stopped and ate our lunch on a beach bluff looking down at the water. We saw pelicans diving into the water and catching fish. We saw surfers surfing. Dogs running along the beach.

My granddaughters loved  every minute on the bikes. It’s funny I did not feel like we had a generation gap any more. We all enjoyed having fun together on our bikes.

That’s the secret.. choose something you all enjoy together!

Happy Father’s day Here’s to those Dad’s raising their children alone

I think our media does not cover how many dad’s are raising their children today.

I have a  high school friend of mine Don,who’s wife walked out on him and his children in the late 80’s. Don’s  daughter was 5 year old girl and his son was 9 year old boy at the time. Don had a very demanding corporate career at that time  and had to adjust his life to balance his career and additional family responsibility. It was so hard for him because he always wanted to married and have a family.

For many years Done was alone raising his children, address all the issues of single parenting, without any support. Most people don’t think of dad’s raising children and mother abandoning  her children.

Don divorced his wife. He’s ex-wife was uninterested in being a mother any more, she id not visit her children or   contact the children on their birthdays or holidays. Don never spoke badly of his ex-wife around his children. He could have.

Don learned how to braid his daughter”s hair before school. He involved  his children in  Boy Scouts,Girl Scouts, Soccer, after high school sports. He took his kids camping , and boating. Together they had many fun adventures.

Don remarried while his children were in grammar school. His wife Barbara  was as committed to supporting the children, but not wanting the children to feel she was taking the place of their mother.

Don’s children are grown adults now, college grads and both are happily married. I know how grateful they are to their father for raising them and showing his love to them.

Today is Father’s Day, so  here is to all those dad’s that took the time to raise and enjoy their children!