Tag Archives: Yellow Ribbon

Commuting Grandma caregiving military grandkids

I have been traveling the entire year, once a month to Arizona which is about 6 hour drive from my home in order to care give my granddaughters, so my son in law can attend his National  Guard weekend. My daughter is serving a one year military assignment overseas  away from her family.

It’s a strange situation because I have to step into and out of a grandma  mom role.It takes my granddaughters two days to adjust to my ways of caring for them. And it takes me that time also to get into the parenting role. Care giving is so different from raising your own children.

1. You have to think twice of every decision you make. How will this effect my son in law, the children and my daughter during my visit and when I go home.

2. You also have to think about the child’s feelings. They have special emotional  stressors that can be triggered due to their situation they are experiencing.  Schools and our communities are unaware of the challenges military children face. Studies have confirmed that military connected children are impacted by separation. Sometimes children will over react over something very trivial.

3. I have to adjust my work schedule around my granddaughters  school, after school activities and school vactions. Since I am not retired I have to really focus on my time management. I have had to focus on my life staying in  balance, knowing what I can and can not do. I have placed my life on hold, but it is well worth this time. It can be an emotional pull, wanting your old life, wishing things were different, put knowing God has a plan and letting go.

4. I have to take in consideration how the children need to stay connected to their mother. Reminding them of sharing every event they can take for granted.

5. I need to keep in mind I too have emotional times, recognizing I miss my daughter, feeling my daughter’s separatation from her children. This I think is the hardest part for me. I pray often for strength and guidance to provide me the right  the support our family needs.

The hardest part of commuting is leaving my granddaughters. Even though I am leaving them in good hands, I feel like I am abandoning them.  I usually cry in car driving back home. I know I must go home and want to, but want to stay with my granddaughters at the same time.

I try to focus on when my daughter returns and she is with her family. We count the days when our daughter will return and it will be very soon.

 

My granddaughters and I are Community Partners at Military Yellow Ribbon events

This was an exciting time for my granddaughters and I to be able to talk with our peers about our experiences with deployment and what to expect. EVERYONE HAS CHANGED!

 

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We were invited as a Community Partner for the Army Reserves there were 40 Community Partners. Each partner provides services to assist the solider  be it- financial, health, emotional challenges, continued education, and my granddaughters and I – family support. My granddaughters were excited, these had their own display table and badges! They enjoyed setting up their own display table. and speaking to families and kids about their book, and video they made. My youngest granddaughter Bailey purchases her own IPAD. She was demoing the Deployed Kids website! I can tell you they were the hit of the Community Partners.

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Somehow I was to busy speaking with families and enjoying how my granddaughters interacted with other military children and families , I forgot to  take a picture of my display! Oh well we will be together next month at another Yellow Ribbon event in Phoenix. I will remember to take a picture

How Yellow Ribbon events help the family to prepare for all stages of deployment?

 

I had the opportunity to present my Key Note speech at a Yellow Ribbon event on April 9 for the 96th MPBN combined with the 321st MP DET CI Army Reserve families.

Yellow Ribbon events are broken down in  a numbered series  from 1- 7.  Series 1-Starting Planning Phase of deployment through  Series 7 – 90 days after returning from active duty.

This Yellow Ribbon event  was addressing Series 3 and 4, present deployment with  educating on how to help your solider  on re reintegration. This one day event started at 8:00 am through 5:00pm . The Family Readiness  coordinates these events for adults and the children. Each military family was given a prepared scheduled  agenda, outlining sessions to attend that would help them with their current and future issues they were about to  experience. I only  wished I would have had this when I was caring for my granddaughters.

The Yellow Ribbon event included other community partners like ourselves,  organizations providing assistance to the military families. These partners provided  table top displays along with their information. For our table top display we  brought a display board, our books -Deployed Grandparents being Parents and Deployed Kids and  business cards . The display board,  our daughter created when she returned from her deployment in Afghanistan in 2008. She created this  for our family’s Welcome home party. Who would of thought at that time I would be using it for a Yellow Ribbon event for  deployed families.

The picture you see is Major Johnson, surprisingly we learned he was  deployed and stationed in Baghram the same time our daughter was there. He worked in the back of the building our daughter was working in. Small world! My husband and I enjoyed hearing what his deployment experiences were like.

The military families enjoyed seeing our display board and sharing their stories of their military loved one’s current deployment with my husband Alan and I.  Alan and I shared our  support and tried to give suggestions on how hope to cope with their present situation. Military mom’s always shed a tear or two with us when they explain how they are dealing with deployment. I reassured these moms, it’s OK to cry, your entitled we are the moms,we are all in this together, and we understand what you are going through.

Yellow Ribbon events are a way for everyone in the family to better understand what are the stages of deployment , how to handle those stages  and most importantly- this event is  for everyone in the family.

I worked with Jhoselyn Ramirez -CFLE  Family Readiness Support Assistant. She provided me with complete instructions on my prior arrival, the day of the event  and what I needed to provide. I found this event was so well organized, educational, and a big stress reliever  for the families. Families shared with me how happy they were to learn how to handle their situation and now knowing where to get support.

I encourage if you are invited to attend your families Yellow Ribbon event you go!

President Obama has said” Military families are the force behind our Force.” And we are those families.

My next blog I will share with you a woman I met,  a married  grandmother. Her husband deployed last year, then  just recently her single parent daughter deployed leaving her daughter’s children with her. She was a Deployed Wife and a Deployed Grandma at the same time!