Tag Archives: Stress

Week one with our daughter gone

The first two days we all felt like our daughter would be coming home any minute.

This reminds me of a death in the family. Then you realize that  person is not going to come home for a long time. You miss that person so much. Its painful, but we know it is temporary, but that does not make feel any better.

The morning after our  daughter left  my eldest granddaughter Ivie  was annoyed with her sister and started fighting. When I tried to talk to her she would not look me in the eyes, that’s  when I knew she was upset. After sometime in her room I went to speak to her. She would not look at me and then I deliberately bent down so she would look me in the eyes. And once she looked me in the eyes, she began to cry. I hugged her and told her I was sad also I began to cry with her. I shared with her that I too missed her mother especially because she is my daughter.

I believe you must be honest and share your true feelings even when it hurts to say it.

I think teenagers have a really tough time dealing with  a parent separation. Even though teenagers want to be on there own doing there own thing. But really they want to have their parent around, even if they don’t care for all the rules.

As for children in elementary school. My granddaughter told me she has to be brave. Just hearing those words makes me sad and proud how hard she is trying to adjust. I try and make an effort to really listen when she is talking.

The grandkids are back, but I am mobile!

It’s happening again. Our daughter is leaving for a lengthy assignment.

This time the granddaughters are staying in their home with their step dad. He is a great guy and wonderful caregiver to our granddaughters. In fact, my granddaughters dedicated their book ,Deployed Kids to him when he was our daughter’s boy friend.

This time I will be commuting once a month to Arizona to help out. It’s going to be very different this time while my daughter is away. But we have known this was coming for some time. No matter how prepared you are for a loved leaving, your not prepared for all that you have to do when they are gone.

While she is away, my granddaughters and I are working together on having our own  radio on demand show on thenew  Military Appreciation Channel. Our show will be called – Families Called to Duty. Our show should be aired in January. It is so much fun working with my granddaughters on something so worthwhile.

Thank goodness for technology so I can be mobile.


How to find Childcare



Here is a picture of my husband Alan and my granddaughter Bailey’s at her school’s Open House. My husband and I both helped her with her school project.

When my daughter deployed and her children arrived in our home the elementary school had been in session for 3 months. I tried to find after school care, and was unsuccessful. This to me was one of the biggest hurdles I faced while they lived with us.

Even though I worked out of my home, I clocked in at 8:00 and worked through 5:00pm. I really did not have a clock, but I pretended I did. I did take breaks and lunch just like any one would if you worked in at a company. This was called time management. I had the freedom to come and go from my office. I had no concerns about anyone else’s schedule except my husband’s. But when my granddaughters lived with us, that all changed.

When they arrived I searched for after school care and found out that all the programs were filled, they did put me on a waiting list. And needless to say no openings came available. I then had to figure out how I was going to put in the same amount of work time, but around my granddaughters school schedule. This was stressful, trying to balance out all my responsibilities. I had to stop what I was doing when my granddaughters  came home from school at around 2:45. Once they shared how their day was, they would  get a snack and then  began their home work. I would help them for about an hour and half,until my husband came home from work. I then went back to work for an hour and then started dinner. Once the children were in bed, I would work for 2 hours until I went to bed.

Schools now a days have half days once a week, that made my work day even harder. I had to figure out how to adjust my time. My granddaughters were very understanding and we  soon got into  a routine.

I realized I had to cut out my personal time, watching TV and crafting. There just wasn’t enough time in the day. I knew my granddaughters needed me. And I would remind myself when I had those hard days,  this time will pass and my family will be back to normal.  I would then sit and picture how happy were going to be when my daughter returned.

I had to go back and remember when I was a mom with children, I had very little time for myself. I think it is harder for women that have raised their children and you never think that you will be in that situation again of raising children.

Today I have learned that there are so many more resources for caregivers for children with daycare. Unfortunately, I was unaware of these organizations.  I understand these two organizations will also help those with financial difficulties.

This organization  helps find childcare providers for civilian and military families.


This organization is a nonprofit supporting grand parenting